way back college boy asked to a high school dance
couldn't wait, but my date was in my friend's pants.
didn't know what to do, mc feelin blue,
til my best friend said that the red would get me through.
went to the jewel with my crew, adults only box,
in a second hand suit, bow tie, i'm a fox.
in a car on the street, in my mouth swisher sweet
down that shit at my crib in a one gulp feat.
room starts to turn like cheese,
my tummy starts to churn like grease,
on my knees like a rug burn beast
like an intern tease with a yeast (infection.)
all the while on the tile, feel like I got the flu.
think I'm gonna throw, I think this night is through
ding dong, date's arrived and her dress is ripped.
she don't know I'm on a robotussin trip.
in the back two girls going stag fat asses.
i demand from the date her sunglasses.
do a drop roll out the car like axel.
I need an angel, I need some fuckin advil.
I got a buzz bigger than a behive
cough up my cookies let loose what's on the inside

chorus
the tussin, the tussin
put it down like it was nothing
robocop couldn't stop me puking and flushin
no balls to be bustin, no fightin, no cussin
just love for a drug called robotussin

way back college boy, live on eleventh floor.
head out my window, wonder what I'm living for.
knock on my door, what's in store, it's my buddy bux
with the rabbit ear pockets saying he is out of luck.
Need a forty for party thrown by laura kang at rubin.
all he's got is snot and a box full of ludens.
Tell'm bout the tussin, we're hayden ho hustlin'
interupting discussions about reagonomic reprocussions.
Fuck'm, we're fuckin chug luggin.
soon my stomach I'm huggin I'm trippin or something
my coat I button, keep it down like a dungeon.
you could call me the cough medicine curmudgeon.
frankly, the feeling's fuckin fantastic
I'm tripping like jesus in the desert when he fasted,
Like it's the night before we all get drafted,
Like we're rowing through some rapids with Kevin Bacon, white water rafting
Like you're on epcot center on acid? Exactly.

chorus